Body,  Mind,  Soul

The Beginner’s Guide to Personal Development

The Beginners Guide to Personal Development as a Stay at Home Mom

We’ve all heard of the importance of self care, especially as a mom and even more as a stay at home mom. You’ve probably even read many posts about self care but you can’t seem to find time, or to just do it. There’s a missing link, actually two. The how and the why. In this post I’ll teach you how to put it into practical practice as a stay at home mom with young children and what seems like not enough hours in the day, or some days too many hours. And most importantly, we’ll look at the why. Why is self care so important and why personal development as a stay at home mom is crucial to your mind, body, soul and honestly to everyone around you.

It took me a long while to finally figure out that self care was not selfish and that if my needs weren’t met, no one else’s needs would really be met either. There were little humans running around counting on me to be well. And that meant taking time for myself.
As I mentioned, it took me a long time – four years and some change to be exact- but I finally did it. I put myself first. I started reading more, I started implementing what I was reading about into my daily life, I started to make lasting changes mentally, spiritually and physically. It took a lot of self discovery and personal development to get me to where I am today. But it was all worth it. Knowing myself allowed me to know my needs and most importantly how to express my needs so they can be fulfilled. You too, can learn how to truly have “me time” without the mom guilt. It will take practice and patience, but this is what I’m here for.

What does Personal Development as a Stay at Home Mom even mean?

We have heard it time and time again. Self care is important. And self care is not selfish, but why can’t you seem to shake the mom guilt of just wanting 5 minutes of quite. Why do you feel the only “me time” you can afford is after everyone’s gone to sleep… but lets be honest is that really self care when you have to sacrifice your sleep for “self care” or me time? I get it. I’ve been there before… and I stayed there for a long time. I felt as if that was my only option. Sacrificing sacred sleep for what I thought was self care. I learned the hard way, it was not self care but a simple – set up for failure the next day.

If you’re asking yourself if being a stay at home mom with young kids and personal growth and self care is even possible, my answer is absolutley!

Misconceptions

I’d like to address a few misconceptions about self care and personal development as a stay at home mom. The first being, that we as “moms” can do it ALL. And you know what, we CAN do it all, because often times we just “have to,” but we shouldn’t have to. especially alone. And eventually somethings going to get neglected or in this case someone, and that someone is you, momma. Self care is important, but let’s make sure we’re all doing it the right ways. Ways in which it will change our lifestyle, out look on life, our children, spouse and the world.

Another misconception is that you have to spend money to practice good self care and gain personal growth. That is far from the truth. I have been able to do so much self care simply by meditating, reading books specifically on topics that would help with personal growth – that was a win win. I learned how to involve the kids in things I enjoyed. This allowed me to share what I liked to do with the kids and it gave me a sense of freedom to not have to do only what the kids wanted to do.

The last misconception of many, that I would like to address is time. You may be thinking “if only I had more time”, I’m just so “busy,” or “there’s more laundry to be done.” How about instead of saying you’re too busy for self care try saying “it’s not a priority,” and see if that changes your perspective. When I started saying “I wasn’t a priority,” it completely changed my way of prioritizing. Now, instead of saying I didn’t have time to read or give myself a facial, I started MAKING time. Instead of sitting on the couch with Netflix in the background as I scrolled through social media, I spent those two hours taking a hot shower, giving myself a facial, meditating and ending with a book that focused on personal growth. It was a priority. I made it a priority. It was on top of the list of things to do early in the morning or right after the kids went to bed. I had to start making myself a priority.

I know you’re probably feeling the mom guilt just thinking about the endless to do list and trying to fit in self care (even though you know you need it) but remember, it is detrimental to your livelihood that you practice self care for personal growth – we’ll discuss mom guilt in a whole mother blog post. For now let’s take a look at the how to.

How to get started with Personal Development

All you need to start this journey of self care, self discovery and personal growth is hunger… a deep motivation to be better, to be more than “just a mom,” to be a happier, healthier mom. For yourself. This doesn’t have to be for anyone else. When I first started I thought self care was doing an extra load of laundry after the kids went to bed, or scrubbing the bathroom because I wouldn’t have to deal with interrupting toddlers trying to do it the next day. But all those things were for everyone else. Now I do laundry with the kids, I let them help me fold. They help me help them.

I am here to help guide you, teach you and talk to you, but you will have to do the deep digging and hard work to grow in yourself and be successful, for yourself.

Tips for Success for Personal Development as a Stay at Home Mom

You can be successful in personal growth because you are at your ends and need real life, practical, simple ways to get started on this journey. Most importantly you need help to help yourself, and I am here to be just that! If you’re ever feeling like you just can’t do it, you just can’t make time, it just isn’t a priority, comment, email me, contact me in anyway and I can be here to support you on this long hard journey to happiness, health – mentally and physically – and total self care.

Common Questions/FAQ About Personal Development as a Stay at Home Mom

What is personal development? This is going to be a lifelong process, so it has to start now. It will be a lifelong process of setting goals, learning about yourself and your potential, freedom, self care, self love, growing in confidence, in mind, body and spiritual strength. Personal development is the growing ad changing of you’re total self so you can change the world.

Is personal development selfish as a full time mom?
No way! In fact it is the opposite of selfish. When you grow as a person in mind, body and soul, your cup is being filled and it will overflow. This overflow of joy, contentment, courage, energy and so much positivity will only pour out onto the ones who matter most in your life, your children. If there’s one thing you need to do on your to-do list today, that is practice some sort of self care for personal development – oh and feed the kids. 🙂

Why should you start personal development?
You should start working on yourself now so in five years, ten years you don’t have to look back and say I wish I changed then, I wish I knew better then, I wish I took care of myself so I would be able to take care of those I loved most better. Personal growth is for yourself, but as a stay at home mom, it is the best thing you can do for your child(ren.)

The Last Thing You Need to Know about Personal Development as a Stay at Home Mom

I am happy to say, I have overcome the mom guilt of needing five minutes or more alone time to center myself and come back a happier, healthier (mentally and physically) mother and wife. It has been a long and difficult road of self discovery and a hunger for personal development that has brought me to where I am today. I lost myself in all that life was throwing at me. I was deep in the dark and down in the gutters, but I was also down there alone. That meant, I was the only one who could get myself out. I had to make the choice to climb out, and as I did I started seeing steps appear, in the form of books, podcasts, self care moments, fitness and more. I saw that all those things were self care and apart of my own personal growth and they had to be on top of my never ending list of things to do. But I was committed to finding out how to grow as an individual, as a mother and wife but not lose my total self along the way, again.

Are You Ready?

If you’re ready to delve into personal development in mind, body and soul you’re in the right place. A place of vulnerability, transparency and a place to grow together. Please, join the community (I didn’t have while I was down in the ditches) by signing up for my email list and be added to a private community of stay at home moms, here to support each other in self care and personal growth with young children and the never ending demands of our lives.

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